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Conspiracy of Inner Shopaholic

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Am I a Shopaholic? Nah

Do I shop every week? Nah

Do I have clothes which I haven’t even looked at, after buying them? Nah

Do I get greedy and buy things when I go to buy gifts for my friends? Nah

Do I buy thinking I might need it “once upon a time”? Nah

Well, all that is not me, it’s the conspiracy of my inner shopaholic who plays tricks and manipulates me, here is what I see and what my inner shopaholic makes me do:

Me: I see a “Sale”

Inner Shopaholic: Just go inside and see what is on sale. Window shopping is fun!

Me: I see a dress

Inner Shopaholic: Check the price, it’s an awesome deal, you might not get this kind of a deal again, just buy it.

Me: I don’t need new clothes, I still have so many I still haven’t worn

Inner Shopaholic: Seriously? You don’t have any clothes. Look, the lady next to you is waiting to grab it, if you leave it down, its gone. She is eyeing for it, that means it’s beautiful.

Me: Ok fine, I will just keep it for a while and leave it back before I check out

Inner Shopaholic: Look at this shoe, it’s so classy

Me: I have something similar

Inner Shopaholic: Yeah, but not the same. This is a little darker shade and goes really well with “XYZ” dress, the other one is not as good as this and it’s a month old. Your feet will anyway not grow, so just pick it up.

Me: I don’t need a purse, let me avoid this section

Inner Shopaholic: It will not hurt to do a quick check

Me: I can’t decide which one should I buy, I really love all of these

Inner Shopaholic: You work so hard, you should pamper yourself. Gift yourself all of these, one for valentine’s day, one for Mother’s Day and then your birthday is coming up and then just because you deserve it.

Me: Wow! Winter jackets are on sale, but I have a lot of jackets

Inner Shopaholic: Winter is forever in Canada, you don’t need too many clothes but you surely need jackets, that’s what you wear for 18 hours in a day.

Me: Oh, I have something similar

Inner Shopaholic: That’s a long jacket, this is short. Also, you been wearing same jackets is all your pictures, aren’t you bored?

Me: Ok, let me sort these and see what I really have to buy.

Inner Shopaholic: Did you shop for so long wasting your time to sort and leave it all back? Just buy, when you go home, you can sort it out in leisure and return it (which never happens).

I am sure, this is not just about me but about every shopaholic out there. Isn’t it clearly the conspiracy of Inner Shopaholic which is residing within us? Why be blamed for something which we clearly dint do?